A Slytherin in Gryffindor House
by Ashirah
Summary: In her mind, however, she was screaming. My name is not Hermione Granger. I am Natalya Dolohov ... I am sacrificing it all for you, Harry Potter, so you'd better be bloody grateful. Rated M for future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** I began writing this story several years ago, the latest in a list of quite a few fics I had written and published. Fanfiction writing is an anonymous outlet for me to work through a lot in my life in addition to working on my skills as a writer. Unfortunately, someone in my personal life decided to track down my FF penname and read everything I had ever posted. Not only was it a violation of trust (in that they knew my desire to only share my writings anonymously), but they caused a good deal of grief for me by hassling me about the content of my stories and assuming that various details were based on my opinion of them. The debacle rather ruined writing (of fanfiction as well as original stories) for me for quite a while, giving me a writer's block I couldn't seem to overcome.

Tonight I'm feeling like it is time to break out of that rut by posting this chapter that has sat on my hard drive for years. I intend to finish this story, as it has popped into my head multiple times over the years and I have wished that I had finished it before now.

I hope that you enjoy the story as it unfolds, and bear with me as I am so _very_ out of practice.

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_**A Slytherin in Gryffindor House: **_

_**Chapter 1**_

**Year One**

Natalya Dolohov walked at a brisk pace through her father's house, having been just informed by a house elf that her parents wished to speak to her. At nearly twelve years of age, Natalya had just hit the five foot mark and she was beginning to leave her childish features behind. Her long chestnut hair contrasted nicely with her fair skin, and there was almost always a healthy rose glow to her face and brightness about her eyes. It was no secret among those who knew her that she was abnormally intelligent for one so young, and her family encouraged her to use that intelligence to the fullest extent.

Entering her father's study, Natalya saw three people already there. Two she knew, her mother Irina and her father Adrian. The third figure, however, was entirely new to her. He was a tall man with long silver hair and an equally long silver beard. His blue eyes twinkled merrily, but concern was written on her mother's face.

"Come, Natalya," instructed her father, "sit with us. There is a matter of great importance we must discuss."

She did immediately as instructed, wondering just what the appearance of such a strange wizard might have to do with her. And of his status as a wizard she had no doubt. Even disregarding his wizards robes, it would be a strange day indeed that a Dolohov would allow muggles within their home.

"Things have occurred, dearest daughter," her father continued, "that have changed our plans for your upcoming year of school. We have decided against sending you to Durmstrang as your elder brother did, and instead will be sending you south. This gentleman is Albus Dumbledore, the headmaster of Hogwarts."

"Hogwarts?" asked Natalya suspiciously. "Why would I be sent there?"

Irina Dolohov walked over and knelt gracefully beside her daughter. "Listen to me, Natalya. This is your decision, but you must understand what is at stake. The mark on your father's arm has begun to trouble him once more, and I don't need to explain to you what that means. We are prepared to help Dumbledore's friends in fighting against the dark arts this time, but he is asking that you help as well. In fact, perhaps Dumbledore would explain this better than I."

"Miss Dolohov," said Dumbledore immediately, "it is a matter of great importance that I wish you to help with. You know the stories of the Boy-Who-Lived, I am sure. He will be attending Hogwarts this fall, and I would like to see him well protected. An intelligent girl such as yourself would easily be able to befriend him and, shall we say, keep an eye on him. He has been raised among muggles, and will not fully comprehend the danger he is in."

Natalya considered the man's words for a moment before responding. "Mister... Headmaster Dumbledore, I'm afraid I don't fully understand where I might help you. Even my father will not be able to openly declare in your support, and so I hardly see where the daughter of Adrian Dolohov would be able to do any differently. Least of all by befriending Harry Potter."

"You are just as quick as your parents said," continued Dumbledore with a smile. "You, Miss Dolohov, will be attending Hogwarts not as yourself. We will show you how to apply glamours to alter your appearance, and you will be known as a muggleborn witch."

"A mudblood?" asked Natalya, shocked. "That's worse than blood traitor!"

"Natalya!" scolded her mother, "that is hardly fitting language for a lady, however correct you may be. Understand that you could hardly pretend to be a pureblood or halfblood, because then you would have to explain being unknown to all. Besides, it would take a muggleborn or a... a blood traitor... to befriend Potter easily. Pureblood ways are just too different from that of the muggles. I'm sure though that you can imitate them adequately. After all, you are not altogether unfamiliar with their ways, however above them you may be."

"So you will rob me of my remaining childhood in order to have someone close to one of your own?" asked Natalya, glaring daggers at Dumbledore.

"Many have paid a higher price," said Dumbledore gravely and without hesitation. "You would be doing the Wizarding world a great service."

Taking a deep breath, Natalya nodded. "Alright. If I were to agree… IF… Who shall I be known as?"

Dumbledore smiled and his eyes twinkled brighter. "You will be known as Hermione Granger, the daughter of two muggle dentists."

##########

Natalya stood before the large mirror in her room with her mother behind her, trying on the muggle clothing they had purchased and deciding what must be done for her glamour.

"It needn't be too drastic, dearest," said Irina. "We'll leave your beautiful chocolate eyes alone, but we must do something about your hair. It looks far too much like your father's did when he was younger. Perhaps... yes... there we are."

The image in the mirror had changed, and Natalya's sleek dark hair was replaced with bushy, shorter hair of a lighter brown. "It's ghastly, mother! It looks as if I'm incapable of using a hairbrush!"

Irina laughed melodically. "Yes, dear, which makes it perfect. Only a muggle would allow their hair to look that way, rather than using a potion or charm to just fix the problem."

Natalya stared at the image looking back at her, her heart falling a bit more. Yes, perhaps it was her vanity getting in the way, but what else would be taken from her before this was all over?

##########

The Hogwarts Express loomed before her, filling Natalya's heart with dread. This was a time for her to be excited over her studies and chase after boys, not bear a burden that should have been placed on an adult's shoulders. Although, she would be doing both in a way, just not quite as she would have liked. She took a few steps forward, edging towards the entrance of what would be practically the end of her life as Natalya.

Once on board, Natalya found herself aiding a young boy in search of his toad. Neville Longbottom, he had said his name was, and Natalya recognized the name as that of a pureblood family with an important past in the fight against Voldemort. Surely, she thought, this was someone who she would like to have on her side.

The search brought her to a compartment where two boys sat, one with black hair and one with red. "Has anyone seen a toad?" she asked. "Neville's lost one."

As soon as she spoke she realized things were starting badly. She was raised a pureblood lady and it was hard to suppress the training. She knew full well she was sounding bossy, but now there was no help for it. The red haired boy said something, but Natalya didn't listen. She was too busy staring at the battered wand in his hand. "Oh, are you doing magic? Let's see it, then."

The redhead stared at her for a moment before agreeing and clearing his throat nervously. His spell was dreadful, a child's rhyme and nothing more. Natalya tried to be kind about it, she really did, but it was just too dreadful. "Are you sure that's a real spell?" she asked. "Well, it's not very good, is it? I've tried a few simple spells just for practice and it's all worked for me. Nobody in my family's magic at all, it was ever such a surprise when I got my letter, but I was ever so pleased, of course, I mean, it's the very best school of witchcraft there is, I've heard-I've learned all our course books by heart, of course, I just hope it will be enough- I'm Hermione Granger, by the way, who are you."

She spoke it all very fast, afraid she'd lose her nerve and just tell them the truth if she didn't. The redhead introduced himself as Ron Weasley, and the black haired boy was none other than Harry Potter. This was her job, her duty as laid down by her parents. Not knowing what else to say, she prattled on in her mind about Harry Potter being mentioned in several books.

In her mind, however, she was screaming. _My name is not Hermione Granger. I am Natalya Dolohov , daughter of Adrian and Irina Dolohov. My uncle, Antonin, is serving a life sentence in Azkaban for his support of the Dark Lord, and for that reason I seek to undo the harm to our family's name by sacrificing my childhood. I am sacrificing it all for you, Harry Potter, so you'd better be bloody grateful._

##########

As they waited as a group outside the Great Hall, the words of Professor McGonagall had set her mind racing once more. _The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards._

This was ridiculous. All of it. Yes, there were good reasons for doing it. And yes, she had agreed to do it. But bloody hell, she was having to completely alter her personality... and that was assuming she managed to get the Sorting Hat to sort her as they needed her to be sorted. Headmaster Dumbledore had spoken with her about the Sorting process and what she must do, but Natalya was far from convinced it would work. By rights she should be in Slytherin, but somehow she was supposed to get into and survive the house that had been their rival for years.

She noticed that those around her were oblivious of what would happen at Sorting, so she began to whisper nervously about various spells that might be required for any number of tests. She kept it up until they were allowed to enter.

The Great Hall was semi-impressive, Natalya would grant that. But the way in which the others were staring at her as she joined the other first years to be Sorted was unnerving. She waited patiently as they went down the list and one by one the first years were sent to sit with their Houses.

"Granger, Hermione."

Finally. The moment her new name was called Natalya practically ran to the stool and shoved the Sorting Hat on her head. She focused hard on her thoughts, as Dumbledore had instructed her to do, practically shouting her thoughts so that the Hat might take notice. _Please, I have to be in Gryffindor. I'm here at Dumbledore's request to protect Harry Potter. He'll be in that House, and I _have_ to be there too._

It didn't take long for the hat to respond. _Strange request, Miss Dolohov, but that would explain why they are calling you Miss Granger. I think you are more of a Slytherin myself, so it would be passing strange to put you where you wish. Very well, if it's that important to you..._ "GRYFFINDOR!"

##########

The first few weeks of school passed quickly. Natalya was getting settled into the playing of her character, and doing her best to think of herself as Hermione Granger rather than Natalya Dolohov. She succeeded in all of her classes, though that was hardly surprising as her parents had taught her what they could. If those around her believed her to be a mudblood and with no prior knowledge or practice... well... it wouldn't hurt anything to let them believe it. Except, perhaps, her pride.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: **These first few chapters will go by somewhat fast. They are meant as a type of prologue almost, and as we get into later school years the story will slow down and begin. So bear with me, and I hope you enjoy seeing these glimpses of how the charade developed Natalya/Hermione's character. :)

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**A Slytherin in Gryffindor House:**

**Chapter 2**

**Year Two**

Natalya dove to the floor, catching herself on her feet and hands almost like a cat. She panted heavily, and felt sweat pooling on her body. How long had she and her father been training? She wasn't sure. They had started an hour after breakfast, and in light of how her stomach had given up on growling she guessed that it was well into the afternoon and nearing dinnertime.

"What time do you think it is, father?" she asked, flicking her wand upwards and shouting "Protego!" to block the stinging jinx her father had sent her way and then sending a jelly-legs jinx towards him.

"It doesn't matter, Natalya," he said sternly, blocking the jelly-legs jinx easily. "I am going easy on you. Do you think your enemy will stick to non-deadly spells? Do you think they will let you break for tea?"

She flung herself to the side to avoid a tickling hex. "No, father," she said quickly. "Thank you, father." Several hexes in a row flew towards her and she threw herself back to the floor to evade them, casting a hex in return as she went down.

Adrian Dolohov grimaced in thought of how his daughter had spent the last month. "You are already behind in your studies since you insisted on spending part of your summer among muggles. While I can understand needing to understand their culture, you must invest the majority of your efforts in your ability to _stay alive_."

Natalya ducked to avoid another stinging jinx rather than casting an unnecessary Protego. Her body was tired, yet her magic was beginning to feel even more drained. She wasn't quite fast enough and she felt a slight tingle as the jinx grazed her shoulder.

This was going to be a long day.

_##########_

It had been a long summer and Natalya was trying to get back into character.

"We can actually meet him!" Natalya squealed. "I mean, he's written almost the whole booklist!"

As she made her way into the bookstore with her parents, using polyjuice to look like muggles, Harry, and the Weasleys, Natalya fought her way forward in the crowd to see Gilderoy Lockhart as he stood signing his books. He caught sight of Harry and immediately launched into another publicity stunt.

Natalya felt her mother catch up and stand behind her as they both watched Lockhart. "Not what I would have expected from his books," she said just loud enough for her mother to hear.

"There is certainly something strange about him," said Irina Dolohov, "and yet other people's accounts confirm his claims. Keep an eye on him, Na… Hermione."

Natalya and her mother observed quietly as they concluded their purchases and followed the Weasleys out. Platinum blonde hair caught her eye and she watched, frowning, as Lucius Malfoy and his son, Draco, confronted the group. Lucius' eyes strayed over Natalya's mother and father, his face a picture of scorn as he insulted them all. Natalya felt her face flushing in anger, her weight leaning forward as if she were about to walk forward and give the Malfoys a piece of her mind.

Just in time she felt her mother's hand resting on her shoulder and stopped in her tracks. The hand gripped tightly, and Natalya knew that her parents were as outraged as she. They were purebloods, they were wealthy, and to be looked down the nose at by Lucius Malfoy was beyond insulting. Lucius had practically been the Dark Lord's _puppet_ in his search for power during the last war. At least Uncle Antonin hadn't been a puppet. Not in that demeaning way.

_##########_

The year began to pass much like her first, and Natalya once more settled into the role of Hermione Granger. This talk of the Chamber of Secrets worried her though. Not just because it was part of her task to help Harry, but also because it was supposed to target muggleborns and what if she _wasn't_ targeted? Would people guess? Or would those who suspected Harry feel their suspicions confirmed because his "muggleborn" friend wasn't targeted? It made her anxious, to say the least. Perhaps a bit obsessive as well.

Ah well, she had plenty of time to deal with that later. In the meantime she took out her wand and the small mirror she had convinced the boys to bring her. The charms that kept her identity as Hermione Granger intact had begun to wane under Madam Pomfrey's care.

"What have we here?" drawled a very distinct voice which made Natalya jump.

"Professor Snape," she said in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

He walked over to the side of her hospital bed and looked at her sternly. That is to say, his expression looked exactly as it always did. "Imagine my surprise, Miss Granger, when I heard of your little mishap involving Polyjuice Potion, and only a month after my stores were short on shredded Boomslang skin, Lacewing flies, and powdered Bicorn horn. I wished to explain to you the severity with which I handle thieves. But then I come here and find you working on a glamour and I demand to know why."

"It is quite simple, Professor Snape," said Natalya. "I'm just practicing my spells since it is _quite_ boring in this hospital bed."

"Mmm…" Snape took out his wand and cast a series of spells. To Natalya's horror, she felt the glamours drop away and knew that the face before him was not that of Hermione Granger. "Who are you?" he demanded.

"You had best ask Dumbledore if you want the answer to that question," she said angrily, hoping that if she said it with enough fervor that he might accept it and go to Dumbledore as she requested. Or better yet, give up this line of questioning entirely.

He raised an eyebrow at her. "Or you, Miss Granger or whoever you are, might tell me yourself."

"Why should I trust you?" she demanded.

"The fact that Dumbledore trusts me should be enough for you."

She crossed her arms stubbornly.

"_Legilimens._"

Natalya felt Snape going through her mind, pulling up memory after memory. Terrified and unsure of how to fight him off, Natalya gripped her wand tightly and shouted "Protego!"

He withdrew from her mind, but kept his wand out. "Tell me, or I will keep searching through your memories until I find the truth."

She clenched her jaw angrily, then finally relented. She had heard rumors of Professor Snape's skills from her parents. They had not yet taught her to protect herself against Legilimens, at which he was apparently more than proficient. If he was determined to know the truth, then there wasn't a bloody thing she could really do to stop him. "What do you wish to know? I am doing what I am at the request of Dumbledore, and I would hope that would be enough. He did not wish for me to speak of it with anyone, and I would prefer if you would respect that and leave me be."

"Who are you?" he demanded.

"Natalya Dolohov."

"Dolohov? A relative of Antonin's?"

She looked down, pretending to find her fingernails quite fascinating. "His niece," she said softly. "I am the daughter of Adrian and Irina Dolohov."

Snape sat down in a chair next to the bed, contemplating quietly. "And your purpose here?" he asked finally.

"To become close friends with Harry, so that I can stay close by and watch over him."

"Do you give up your secrets so easily to everyone who demands them?" he sneered.

Natalya glared up at him. "Well since I'm not trained in Occlumency I could hardly keep it from you now that you are suspicious. Though if you must know, Dumbledore and my parents are the only ones who know. At least, so far as I'm aware."

"You have gotten yourself into a great deal of trouble along with those friends of yours, but this… what was Dumbledore thinking asking this of you?"

"It is not so terrible as what he has asked of you," she said softly. "And yes, Dumbledore and my parents have told me a bit about you. Not everything, I am sure, but enough."

"That is different. You are a _child_," he hissed.

Natalya gave a little half smile. "Yes, but Professor, you were not much more than a child when your role in this began, and if the Dark Lord regains control this child can be killed as easily as any. Perhaps easier. And besides, after the acts of my uncle… it is my duty to do what I can."

"And when others discover you?" asked Snape.

"Well, Professor, I think I have done an admirable job so far if I do say so myself," she said with a smirk. "You caught me, it's true, but you wouldn't have if I wasn't here injured. And I still have everyone else fooled."

"I don't think anyone would expect to find that a Dolohov was sorted into Gryffindor."

"Heh," she said, waving her hand as if in dismissal. "You might be surprised what the sorting hat takes into consideration. It wanted me in Slytherin, but I insisted that I couldn't. So you might say I'm a Slytherin in Gryffindor house. I certainly don't think like them, though maybe one or two things have rubbed off on me."

"And those things are?"

"That is for me to know. And yes, you could force it out of me, but if you don't mind I'd rather get these glamours back in place and get some rest. Perhaps any other questions could be directed at Dumbledore?"

Snape just shook his head. "It is your secret, Miss Dolohov, and I will keep it. For now."

_##########_

The next day in Potions class Snape was in a worse mood than usual. Nothing was good enough, and 'Hermione' in particular seemed to anger him. He spent a good five minutes by her desk berating her for not understanding the difference between textbook learning and having a talent for potions.

Her temper was finally getting to her when he abruptly walked away. With a sigh she picked up her textbook and stifled a gasp at what she found lying underneath it. She glanced up at Professor Snape but he wasn't looking in her direction. There on her desk lay a small, well-worn book entitled _A Practical Guide to Legilimency and Occlumency_. With a smirk she slipped it quickly into her bag. Maybe it wasn't so bad that Snape was in on her secret.


	3. Chapter 3

_**A Slytherin in Gryffindor House:**_

_**Chapter 3**_

**Year Three**

Over the summer before her third year at Hogwarts, Natalya went with her parents on holiday to France. It was almost strange to see herself in the mirror after spending the majority of the last two years glamoured to be Hermione Granger. They had split their time among wizarding France to see friends and muggle France so she could continue learning the character she must play. At times thinking like a muggleborn Gryffindor came so easily to Natalya that it startled her. She missed spending her days in jeans and trainers, and while she remained proud of her family line, much of what she heard said by purebloods disturbed her.

Her mother walked into the room as Natalya finished brushing out her long, smooth hair. "It's so different," she told her mother, "being me again. I keep looking in the mirror and expecting to see dull, bushy hair and an utter lack of cosmetics."

Irina laughed, looking at her daughter's reflection. "You look lovely either way, my dear. Though I do confess I prefer the hair you were born with. Has it been terrible for you, this pretense at Hogwarts?"

Natalya sighed. "I think much longer of this and I will begin answering only to Hermione. It has been… an adjustment. Not torture, but I cannot relax ever without fearing that I will reveal my secret. And what a waste that would be after all this time devoted to it."

Her mother smiled, eyes glittering in amusement.

"What is it, mother?" asked Natalya.

Irina took her wand and began an elaborate braided hairstyle for her daughter. "Well we shall brush up on your Slytherin qualities tonight, dearest. We are going to formal dinner at the home of Nicolas and Charlize Bonaccord. I hear there will be purebloods from England there as well, the Malfoys and a friend of theirs. Perhaps you might get a laugh or two from meeting them as yourself."

Natalya winced at the thought of seeing Draco Malfoy again. One of these days she was going to smack him across the face.

Her mother had already selected dress robes for her, a lovely cerulean blue silk with ivory lace which showed glimpses of her bare skin underneath. Between that and a touch of make-up, Natalya looked very different from the girl known as Hermione Granger.

##########

The room glowed softly with candlelight as the pureblood wizards and witches socialized at the Bonaccord home. Natalya stood by her parents, dutifully greeting everyone she was introduced to.

"Adrian, I have someone here you may remember," said the voice of their host, Nicolas.

Following her parents lead, Natalya turned towards the voice behind them. Her eyes widened slightly and she fought to suppress her reaction.

"I believe you know Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy?" asked Nicolas with a smile. "And of course, Severus Snape. This is Adrian and Irina Dolohov."

Her father, a rather quiet man, nodded in greeting. Her mother was much more gracious. "How lovely to see you again," said Irina, "it has been quite some time. Allow me to introduce our daughter, Natalya."

Natalya curtsied daintily. Snape looked quite different than she had always seen him. His wizarding robes were still black but of expensive fabric, freshly pressed and properly tailored. Natalya suspected Narcissa Malfoy may have deserved the credit for that. His hair was smoothed back and secured at the nape of the neck. He looked terribly uncomfortable, but also a few years younger and much more appealing. Not that his attractiveness had any bearing on anything. "I read some intriguing research on Valerian recently. Are you, by chance, the same Severus Snape?"

The Dolohovs and Malfoys laughed and left the two to discuss potion making. After an awkward moment, Snape was the first to speak. "So are you truly such a bookworm during the summers as you are when portraying your alter ego?"

Natalya smiled innocently up at him. "I don't know what you mean, sir. Nobody likes insufferable know-it-alls."

She would have enjoyed more verbal sparring with her Professor, but the Malfoy spawn chose that moment to appear. His voice was no less irritating out of school. "Professor, would you introduce me to this lovely lady?"

Natalya was irate. For two years Draco Malfoy had treated her abominably while believing her to be a mudblood with frizzy hair. And now, after all that time, it was apparent he had good manners when he wished to use them. She raised one eyebrow slightly as if appraising him while Professor Snape introduced her as "Miss Natalya Dolohov," but found she couldn't bring herself to be cordial to Draco bleeding Malfoy.

"If you will excuse me, Master Snape, I should be returning to my parents."

She pretty much went into hiding for the rest of the evening. Maybe she should have enjoyed the opportunity to revel in her pureblood heritage, or maybe she should have clung to the idea of Gryffindor bravery. The problem was that she no longer felt comfortable in her skin as Natalya Dolohov. Who was that girl? Natalya Dolohov was still an eleven old girl waiting to be sent away to Durmstrang, with precious few opportunities to discover herself more fully. She couldn't help but wonder if, upon completing her seven years at Hogwarts, there would be much left of Natalya Dolohov at all?

##########

Natalya walked briskly down the corridor, rushing to get to her next class. Time Turner or not, this school year was keeping her on her toes.

"A word, Miss Granger," drawled the voice of Professor Snape, making her jump. He looked particularly exhausted this morning.

"Yes, Professor?" she asked politely. Natalya was still trying to determine what she thought of Severus Snape. He had seemed willing to help her before, but there was no denying that he was a prick the rest of the time. And with him she was particularly vulnerable, as he was one of the few who knew her secret.

He didn't look particularly pleased to be conversing with her. "I trust you have studied the text I gave you last year?"

Natalya smirked. "While I can only hope to reach your skill level, I believe you will find me much improved."

"Indeed, one would hope. You might do well to review page 278 before tomorrow."

"What-" she began to ask, but Snape had already turned and walked away.

##########

The following morning after getting dressed, Natalya dug _A Practical Guide to Legilimency and Occlumency_ out from the bottom of her trunk and turned dutifully to page 278.

_While the arts of Legilimency and Occlumency are considered specific to the human species, there are some cases where the skill of Occlumency especially may be used with magical creatures._

_With species such as Unicorns, an opening of the mind and dropping of all walls may put the creature at ease enough to permit interaction. This can be quite difficult for wizards and witches who have trained in Occlumency, as they have spent their efforts entirely on maintaining strong walls in their minds._

_The reverse can also be true. Some magical creatures use exposing your inner fears as their primary method of attack, and the weaker varieties may be fooled by means of Occlumency. An example would be the boggart, which transforms into whatever shape is most feared by its victim. If the boggart is unable to read the fears of its victim, then the boggart will be in effect rendered harmless. Conventional means of dealing with such creatures may be easiest for the common wizard or witch, but the skilled Occlumens need hardly expend any additional effort._

Natalya shut the book with a sigh and banged her head against it. _This is interesting at all, but would it kill the git to be a bit more direct?_

She continued mentally complaining about Snape's methods all morning. As if it wasn't bad enough that he had given her such cryptic advice, Neville had done disastrously in Potions class and Professor Snape had deducted points in typical scathing fashion because she had intervened against his wishes. Really though, she couldn't just watch poor Neville struggle like that. Wasn't helping her friends the entire purpose of her charade? Gryffindor bravery and chivalry and all that?

That afternoon during Defense Against the Dark Arts, Snape's purpose hit her like a bludger to the head. Professor Lupin had led them out of the classroom and to a different section of the castle, to a nearly empty staff room. Professor Snape had been there and left quickly, though not before a cutting remark. "Possibly no one's warned you, Lupin, but this class contains Neville Longbottom. I would advise you not to entrust him with anything difficult. Not unless Miss Granger is hissing instructions in his ear."

Natalya sighed as she watched Snape's billowing robes leaving the room. When she turned her attention back to class, it was just in time to catch Professor Lupin talking.

"Boggarts like dark, enclosed spaces," said Professor Lupin. "Wardrobes, the gap beneath beds, the cupboards under sinks -I've even met one that had lodged itself in a grandfather clock. This one moved in yesterday afternoon, and I asked the headmaster if the staff would leave it to give my third years some practice.

"So, the first question we must ask ourselves is, what is a boggart?"

Natalya's hand shot up immediately. "It's a shape-shifter. It can take the shape of whatever it thinks will frighten us most."

"Couldn't have put it better myself," said Professor Lupin, and Hermione glowed. "So the boggart sitting in the darkness within has not yet assumed a form. He does not yet know what will frighten the person on the other side of the door. Nobody knows what a boggart looks like when he is alone, but when I let him out, he will immediately become whatever each of us most fears."

Natalya half tuned out what the Professor was saying after that, despite raising her hand obnoxiously to answer questions as everyone would expect. _Damn it all,_ she thought. _What if my greatest fear is that I fail as Hermione Granger? That everyone will discover who I am?_ She focused on the walls she had carefully erected in her mind over the last year, strengthening them and offering up other fears for the boggart to latch onto. By the time it was her turn, she felt ready.

##########

Natalya approached Professor Snape at the end of her next Potions class, after the other students had left the room. "How did you know I would be able to successfully use that with the boggart?"

His lip quirked into what was perhaps the closest thing to a smile that she had ever seen on his face. "I didn't, Miss Granger, but you are certainly an insufferable know-it-all with everything else."


	4. Year 4: Part 1

**Author's Note: **Over the next few chapters, the story will be start to slow down and show more of the progression of Hermione/Natalya's character and her relationship with Severus.

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**A Slytherin in Gryffindor House:**

**Chapter 4**

**Year Four**

Natalya rolled out of bed and promptly grabbed the edge for stability. She was tired. No, she was exhausted. Over the summer her body had begun feeling more and more drained. With every day that passed, she had felt the exhaustion grow. Still she pushed herself, and her parents pushed her, because they all knew that this was necessary. This was their family's pride and honor at stake, and it was on her to restore them both. What other family had a child with the magical ability and maturity to handle such a task? She had something to prove, even if her role had to be secret for a while longer.

The problem was that as the exhaustion had grown, other symptoms had appeared. She was constantly hungry, but nothing sated her hunger. All too often if she moved quickly she would be hit with dizziness, and the day before she had needed to try twice to perform a simple spell in Charms class. Her mind seemed to function just fine, but her body and her magic were another matter altogether. She had managed to do what she must at the Quiddich World Cup, casting various protection spells that had gone unnoticed by Harry and Ron, but all the while in the back of her mind a little voice had questioned whether she would have the strength. And what would have been the price of her failure? Natalya shuddered at the thought.

Looking in the mirror as she got ready for her day, Natalya saw the edge of her glamour waver as if looking at a reflection in water. Taking a deep breath and focusing her effort, the glamour slid smoothly back into place.

That's it. She couldn't let this continue.

She had a free period after Potions class that day, so as soon as the other students left she made an excuse and went back to the Potions classroom. Professor Snape was picking up a stack of parchments off his desk and had turned to leave when she walked in.

"Professor, I need your help. I have looked through books like _Common Magical Ailments and Afflictions_ and found no answer. I… I thought of going to Madam Pomfrey, but… well, I'm afraid that would involve explanations better left unsaid."

He was quiet for a moment, then nodded curtly. A quick motion of his hand and she heard the classroom door shut behind her. "Sit down, Miss Granger," he said, "and tell me what is happening."

Quickly she summarized what had been going on - the utter exhaustion followed by dizziness, hunger, and magical weakness. To her surprise, he took a seat next to her. "Have you felt physical weakness as well, or merely physical exhaustion?" he asked. His voice was surprisingly gentle.

"No," said Natalya with a shake of her head. "I feel like I could sleep for days, but don't feel any more exhausted whether I sit around all day or remain active."

He nodded and studied her, making her want to squirm in discomfort. She remained still though, if only for her pride.

"Drop the glamour for a moment, Natalya," he said softly.

She grinned as she did so and saw his eyes widen just slightly. Only a couple weeks from fifteen years of age, Natalya had changed from the last times he saw her without a glamour. On her mother's advice she had altered her glamour somewhat this past summer to maintain the much younger appearance that Hermione's friends were used to seeing. Her face had slimmed, losing the roundness of childhood. And though the rest of her was covered in school robes, her body had changed as well.

"And your occlumency walls as well," Snape added. "All magic of any sort that you are holding onto, drop it all."

It took effort to follow his command. She had taken to maintaining her glamour and occlumency walls even during the summer so she wouldn't be forgetful once the new school year began. Finally taking a deep breath she felt her entire body relax.

He glared at her. "How long had you held those without rest?"

She looked at him in surprise. _Why such anger?_ "Well, since the school year began, I suppose? I don't drop them often. It seemed easier to just maintain them rather than having to replace them after letting them go."

Snape's expression looked pained, not unlike his expression when Neville was about to blow up a cauldron.

"Even among adult wizards," he said finally, "there are few who can handle the strain of constant magical use. For a child, it is dangerous. You must allow yourself to recover from the exertion rather than continuously maintaining it."

"But it requires minimal—" she began and was quickly cut off.

"There is nothing minimal about _constant_ magical use," he thundered.

Natalya very much hoped there was nobody nearby in the corridor or that Snape had thought to cast a silencing spell. She sighed. "Circumstances require that—"

"No," he interrupted again, but quieter this time. "You must find a way to have breaks from this. Madam Pomfrey would be unable to help you because this isn't a magical ailment, it is simply a case of too much magic."

"Too much magic?" she questioned. "I've never heard of such a thing! Surely if there was such an issue my parents would have warned me."

"Why do you think the Ministry of Magic here has forbidden young wizards and witches from practicing outside of school? It is not just the threat of poorly performed or thought out magic, but a danger to the children themselves if they are foolish with it."

"Ugh," she said, exasperated, and rose quickly with the intention to pace the room. Unfortunately she moved too quickly and had to reach out for the desk when she felt herself losing balance.

"You can't keep this up, Natalya," Snape whispered. "Dumbledore asks much of his pawns, often too much, but this is ridiculous."

"I have to do this…" she began, trailing off. What could really be said? She had to do it, but every reason that came to mind to tell him felt foolish in the moment. Especially when he looked at her so seriously, his dark eyes seeming to see inside her mind although she was certain he hadn't used Legilimency. It made her feel vulnerable, and out of habit she grasped her wand and replaced the glamour and occlumency walls she hid behind. The spells went into place flawlessly, but the exhaustion hit her with even greater force.

She felt herself falling despite the grip she maintained on a desk, until suddenly strong hands reached out and caught her.

Snape sighed heavily and muttered. "I can't believe I'm having to do this. Hold still."

Her body began to tingle and as she rested with her eyes closed it was as if she could imagine this golden glow filling her body. It was blissful. She clung to him, digging her fingers into his chest, unsure quite what was happening but not entirely sure she wanted it to stop. Then the tingling stopped, though the lovely glowing feeling lingered.

"Don't speak of what just happened," he said gruffly. "It's old magic. I used mine to… strengthen yours. It will alleviate the exhaustion for a time, but won't fix the problem altogether. You _must_ start taking care of yourself or you will fail at your task out of shear magical exhaustion."

"Why would you?" she asked softly. While she hadn't known of the possibility of doing such things, she understood enough from what she had been taught by her family to know that such sharing of magic was no simple thing. No one would do it lightly. A person's magic was intricately connected with their very soul.

"There are times I feel bitterness at the demands Dumbledore makes of me." He answered after a moment. "But I know that I deserve this misery because I created the situation for myself. If I can atone for what I have done then I will do so. You… have done nothing to deserve this. You should be enjoying your childhood. Not have this weight upon your shoulders which by the very nature of it you are forbidden to share with your friends."

"Do I look like a child to you?" she asked breathlessly, not giving him a chance to respond before her lips touched his. She wasn't sure what had prompted her to act but she craved the physical connection with him. To her surprise, he didn't fight her. He didn't shout at her for her audacity. His hands gripped her hips and pulled her tight against him.

She relaxed in his arms and Severus withdrew abruptly, his face once again a cold, emotionless mask. "That was inappropriate. Such sharing of magic produces a type of high for some, but it is just a side effect and not true emotion. If this is required again you will be better prepared to resist."

Natalya bit her lip to restrain a number of comments which threatened to emerge.

"Don't worry," he said. "There are other ways you can fix your problem that won't require such actions. You can start by giving yourself a few minutes a day without magic."

##########

As demanded of her, Natalya dutifully began finding time to relax without magic. Not every day, as she hardly saw how she could do that and still make it to all her classes and do everything else required. The small escapes from it all helped some things and hurt others. Her dizzy spells lessened, though the exhaustion remained.

The biggest problem was that in those moments when she wasn't in classes, doing homework, working on S.P.E.W., or listening to the other girls in her dormitory incessantly discussing the upcoming Yule Ball… in those moments, she wasn't Hermione Granger. It was only a few minutes at a time, stolen here and there, but in those minutes she felt much like Natalya Dolohov again. She thought of how things might be for her if she was permitted to be Natalya all of the time, and she thought of things that as Hermione Granger she could not permit herself to think. Mainly she thought about an 'inappropriate' kiss, and the man who had given it to her.

And truly, what was the most infuriating part of it all? First, there was the audacity of the man to kiss her and then lecture her on the impropriety of it. Then there was the fact that she knew so little of the magical exchange which had taken place. Did it really cloud the feelings to the extent that Snape had insisted?

The most infuriating part, if she was honest with herself, was her inability to think of Snape as merely her professor and a fellow pawn of Dumbledore's. Ever since the Bonaccord party the year before, Natalya had noticed things about him that the other Hogwarts students failed to. Things that distracted her in Potions class and had appeared rather uncomfortably in a few dreams. The denial she had clung to regarding her little crush had been impressively shattered by his touch.

Her fury had only grown as time passed and still he showed no sign of remembering the incident. She wanted to call him cold hearted, but she was keenly aware that there was something more to him that he kept locked tightly away. She wanted that something, but she embraced her anger as a means of dealing with the disappointment.

##########

Natalya suppressed a mischievous smirk, exchanging it for the nervous smile of Hermione. The periwinkle blue robes covered womanly curves, which for this night she had permitted herself to only faintly conceal, and her hair was its naturally sleek self and pulled up into an elegant knot.

She greeted her friends breathlessly and reveled in the envy she saw on so many girls' faces when Hermione Granger walked in on the arm of Viktor Krum. Viktor had followed her around the Hogwarts library until she agreed to attend the ball with him. In truth, she would have preferred if she could tell him who she was. It was something though, and helped assuage her irritation that among the students of Hogwarts not even Ron had asked "Hermione" to the dance. Was she that repulsive? It would have been more even worth it had she seen displeasure on Snape's face, but he seemed to be paying her no attention at all.

And after it all, an evening that for all its faults she had managed to enjoy, Ron had to go and try to ruin it. Exhausted after hours of dancing, Natalya had left the ball only to be confronted by a very angry Weasley. _Bloody hell._

It took far longer to tell Ron off than she would have liked, but finally she went to her dorm to change and snuck out to get some time to herself. Lacking in creative ideas for escape, she settled for hiding in an alcove of a little used hallway. With a deep sigh and wave of her wand, she released the magic she had been holding.

Natalya's head leaned back and rested against the wall as she attempted to relax. The silence was broken by a deep voice that made her heart race.

"I should deduct points for your being out past curfew."

She didn't bother moving, but also didn't bother hiding a smirk. "I could argue that I am only here because of your orders. You did, after all, order me to find time without magic. I can hardly drop the glamour whilst in a room with three other girls."

"Such an insufferable know-it-all could find a solution that didn't involve breaking the rules," Snape drawled. "I believe a week of detentions with me might give you new motivation to find such a solution. You can begin directly after dinner tomorrow night in the Potions classroom."

Natalya's back stiffened but she knew better than to argue. Knowing her luck, he would probably add an extra week for each argument she attempted to make and start deducting points while he was at it.


End file.
